The Playbook

4th Oct 2010My third book, “The Playbook”, hits the shelves tomorrow - October 5. Go get one… hundred!


Now before you inundate the comments section with glowing praise and textual “high fives!” for what many are calling the greatest piece of literature of all time, you need to fully understand the power you can wield when giving a compliment.


While it’s perfectly acceptable to compliment someone on an impressive achievement (eg. “Nice rack!”), did you know that a compliment can also be used as a tool to get what you want? (eg. “laid.”) The backhanded compliment is truly an art form - the best will lower the intended target’s self esteem thus making them more susceptible to the power of suggestion. 


Here is a list of some of my favorites that are sure to get the job done as well as keep people in check. 


At the Bar:
You have an amazing body. It’s great to see a woman who’s not at all concerned with the fitness craze.


At the Office:
The report you handed in was great. For once I didn’t have to change the entire thing.


At Her House:
I love what you’ve done with the place. Modern and clean is so yesterday. 


At a Wedding:
Don’t worry. No one is supposed to look good in a bridesmaid dress. 


At a Funeral:
Black is very slimming on you. 


In the Bedroom:
It’s okay. Not everyone knows how to please me. It’s the effort that counts. 


At the Gym:
Nice to meet you. Say… your palms aren’t nearly as sweaty as your forehead.


At the Mall:
I really like those jeans. My grandmother had a pair just like them, but she only wore them when milking.


At the Dinner Table:
Your breath reminds me of all those innocent summer days I spent working on my uncle’s fishing boat.


At the Library:
I’ve always said, “Nerds are the most interesting people I know,” and you look fascinating.


RIDDLE ANSWERS
(sun dress; tank top; bikini, cut-offs, mini-skirt; strip)